English Club

[Molly Malone 4 452]

I suggest that we write the dates of our birth. We could congratulate each other to birthdays

 

Mine is on the 31 of December

[Molly Malone 4 452]

I like this one:

 

A lady goes to her priest and says,”Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing.”

“What do they say?” the priest asks.

“They say, ‘Hi there, big boy. Want to have some fun?’”

“That’s terrible,” the priest says, “but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house. I will put them with my two male talking parrots, who are very religious. I personally taught them how to pray and use a bible. They will stop your parrots from speaking like that; and afterwards, your female parrots will learn how to pray.”

“Oh, thank you!” the woman responds.

So, the next day, the woman brings her female parrots to the priest’s house. At that moment the two male parrots are praying in their cage. Without saying a word, the lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots. Of course, the first thing they say is, “Hi there, big boy. Want to have some fun?”

At the sound of the female parrot voices, one male parrot looks up and says, “Quick! Put the beads (четки) away. Our prayers have been answered!”

[Lady LG 4 159]

Molly Malone

I liked your joke about the parrots. And what did the priest say?

I suggest that we write the dates of our birth. We could congratulate each other on birthdays

To my mind that's a great idea! It's not necessary to inform everybody what year we were born in if we don't want to, but we can write the date. Then we'll be able to congratulate a person and give something to him or her as a birthday present. We can write a poem, send a postcard or organize a concert like victorian's.

I was born on the 20th of October.

Mine is on the 31 of December

Oh, Molly! I guess Father Frost brought you in his sack. It must have been the best present for your father!

 

Самира, Serdar, victorian, when were you born? What do you think of Molly's idea?

 

(See some tasks: page 54, 03.07, 12.32)

 

See you!

Изменено 4 июля, 2011 пользователем Lady LG

[Molly Malone 4 452]

I was born on the 20th of October.

 

Oh, the same date as Arthur Rimbaud's birthday, he is my favourite French poet.

Libra

 

 

Изменено 4 июля, 2011 пользователем Molly Malone

[Molly Malone 4 452]

I liked your joke about the parrots. And what did the priest say?

 

He must have retired at once

[Lady LG 4 159]

It`s great idea but where can I do it? Natash musn`t see it. On my chest? No. On my shoulder or hand? No... Eureka! I`ll do this tatoo on my butt and Natash will never see it but dear Headmaster will.

 

- On the other hand, if she sees the tatoo on my butt, she will get mad...She will steal into my room at night and make a tatoo on my forehead... At this moment the phone rang. It was Natasha.

"Hello, darling!" she said, "Where have you been? What have you been doing? Where have you been hiding? I've phoned you many times this week but nobody answered!"

"I've been on a business trip," Jack replied. "I've just come back and feel exhausted."

[Serdar 2]

A man suspected his wife of seeing another man. So, he hired a famous Chinese detective, Ram Pam Sim Wimm, to watch and report any activities that might develop. A few days later, he received this report:

Most honorable sir: You leave house. He come house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she get on train. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree-look in window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. Fall out of tree, not see. No Fee.

 

;)

Molly Malone you are perfect!

Chinese English is alike on real.

In China girls in railway's ticket office often confuse English words and have specifically accent. After two weeks in China you are used to pronunciation.

 

And this photo from my collection.

Near 2 o'clock am, railway station Zhuzhou.

[Molly Malone 4 452]

Molly Malone you are perfect! smile.gif

 

Danke, Serdar

 

Have you ever been to China?

Изменено 4 июля, 2011 пользователем Molly Malone

[Serdar 2]

Have you ever been to China?

Yes. It was last autumn.

 

I wrote about it on this forum.

Link: http://forum.pushkino.org/index.php?showtopic=58168

[Lady LG 4 159]

One more anecdote abote the Chinese:

 

A smiling Chinese man entered a shop with a colourful big parrot on his shoulder and the shopkeeper exclaimed in surprise,

"Where did you get it?"

"In China, there're millions of them there," answered the parrot."

 

Molly, I demand more euphemisms! (I can't think of any myself)

 

So long, see you!

[Самира 26]

victorian

Thank you very much for your concert! I like it very much

 

one question for all members of English club

Why no one use it is own photo on profile?

 

Dates of birth

 

Molly Malone - 31.12 (Capricorn)

Lady Lg - 20.10 (Libra)

Самира - 24.10 (Scorpio)

Gimini

Victorian

Serdar

Изменено 5 июля, 2011 пользователем Самира

[Molly Malone 4 452]

We could congratulate each other to birthdays

 

Oh god...It just occured to me (while i was digging) that the preposition after the verb Congratulate is ON!!

I think I dig too much...

[Molly Malone 4 452]

A smiling Chinese man entered a shop with a colourful big parrot on his shoulder and the shopkeeper exclaimed in surprise, "Where did you get it?" "In China, there're millions of them there," answered the parrot."

 

[Lady LG 4 159]

Oh god...It just occured to me (while i was digging) that the preposition after the verb Congratulate is ON!!

Never mind, Molly! I corrected the preposition as soon as I saw it and nobody noticed.

[Lady LG 4 159]

A special reminder for Самира (she has missed the task) and everybody:

Molly's task:

Euphemisms

Basically, a euphemism is a substitute word – a polite word or expression that people use when they are talking about something which other people may find unpleasant, upsetting or embarrassing. In other cases, euphemisms can be used to make something sound better than it really is. When we use euphemisms, we are protecting ourselves or others from reality. As you can imagine, many euphemisms refer to sex, bodily functions, war and death. In politics, euphemisms are often used to hide the truth, or to make something bad not appear as bad as it really is. Here are a few examples. The first sentence of each pair is the euphemistic way of saying it; and the second sentence is the more literal translation:

 

- She is a transparent-wall maintenance officer. = She is a window cleaner.

- He works for a waste recycling company. = He is a rubbish collector.

Why don't we compose some euphemisms to these phrases?

 

1. He earns his living selling cucumbers from his garden.

2. I want to spend the night with you and make love.

 

See you!

Изменено 5 июля, 2011 пользователем Lady LG